Friday, January 22, 2010

Why Wouldn't I?

This is a wonderful video explaining how one family made the decision to adopt. I could relate to them on so many levels because we not only can't have more children biologically, but we also did not adopt just one. Thanks Lisa for posting this on your blog so I could see it and share it.

So, why did you decide to adopt? If you haven't adopted yet but have thought about it--- would you mind sharing what is preventing you?

25 comments:

Kat said...

Woohoo! First to reply. I fall into the category of people who have not adopted yet. At this point, my husband and I are not able to adopt because we are still in school and will be moving around from place to place frequently over the next few years. My husband says he wants to have biological kids first but I'm not so sure about that. I am pretty certain that as soon as we graduate, we'll find our child on Reece's Rainbow. Adoption in 2013 here we come!

Anonymous said...

Cost...100% of the problem with adoption for us.

The Howe 5 said...

I love this video. We are adopting because we want to adopt, just the same as we wanted to have biological children

BrokenWithGod said...

My reason for not adopting at this point in my life is pretty simple (or reasons). The first off, and probably the biggest reason is that I am only 20 years old and very much a kid myself. When I do adopt I would like to be married. However, there is a little boy on Reece's Rainbow that has really caught my eye...I would love to have him as my own but the fact is just that I am not ready yet.

ukraine09 said...

We have one biological daughter and wanted her to have a sibling. We also wanted more children and we just both felt that adoption was the way we wanted to add to our family. We have only adopted one child, but would love to adopt more. Cost is the only reason stopping us too. Actually, if and when we can afford to adopt again, we are planning on bringing home as many as we feel we can handle (probably 5).

Jaime

Jamey & Catherine said...

Thanks for sharing, I will be looking for that CD its a beautiful song and a beautiful story!
Catherine

Karen said...

Very sweet....made me cry. I'd be back in Russia (or somewhere) in a heartbeat if the timing were right. I'm hoping in a few years it will work out for us to start the paperwork for #3.

Mary said...

I've known ever since I was a kid that I wanted to adopt someday - my neighbors (who are like sisters to me) were adopted from China and at one point 1/4 of my class was full of adopted kids! I grew up in an area were there were a lot of adoptions (particularly from China and South America) and so it was just something that seemed like a natural way to grow a family. As I've grown older, I am more and more convinced that it is something I want to do.

Right now, the only thing stopping me is that I'm not old enough yet :-P

Melissa said...

We have 3 biological children and 1 adopted child at this time. Our family is a foster family and have provided care for 14 different children in the last 6 years.

We are always asked how we do it, how can we love them and then have to give them back? I have spent a lot of time thinking about this recently and the only answer I have is, that this is what I can do. It is what God has allowed me to do. Each one of the children have come to our home and have become part of our family. They are MY children from the moment they arrive. They need love, and that is what I can do. I can love them!

We hope to adopt again. Right now we have a beautiful 6 month old baby boy that has been with us since he was 8 weeks old. We love him...he loves us...he is my child for as long as God is willing to allow me this privilege.

I feel certain that God has more children planned to bless our home. We will trust Him and see where He leads us!

Terri-Anne said...

I too will blame finances. I have the house (even in a small house there's always room for just one more!) and I know that in Canada, it's easy to stretch the meals to include another mouth, as illustrated by the leftovers I throw away each week. Our wardrobes are nicely supplemented by hand-me-downs already. Extra curricular activities are more of a challenge, because most sports and music lessons, etc are costly to join, and so our kids participate in a minimum of these. But the initial cost of bringing a child into our family, especially thru international adoption is the main barrier for hundreds of families, I'm sure. If someone were to deliver a child or two to my front door with nothing more than the clothes on their backs, and said "Here you go, be her mama," I would be happy to oblige. But that initial cost is astronomical to some lower-middle class families!

MoonDog said...

I have bio kids and I have adopted kids. I an no longer have bio kids but we decided after the last bio kid (before the no longer able part) that any other kids would be adopted. There are all these kids in the world needing a home, why do I need to MAKE anohter one? if you want to raise a child you can do that via adoption. I adore my adopted kids. most days lol. but then I have days when I dont adore my bio kids either. it all comes down to them being KIDS. some days are good some arent. but I am glad to have all of the days even thebad ones.

MoonDog said...

ps I plan to adopt again.

Elizabeth G said...

I would love to adopt (today, tomorrow, yesterday), and my husband would someday. The biggest barrier is financial. That and after 4.5 years of infertility I keep turning up pregnant! We'll have our fourth in under four years this July.

Our six month old was diagnosed with epilepsy at one month, and we've just now turned the corner and gotten it under control, thanks the Lord giving us the ketogenic diet. We are now able to see she will survive and may well thrive. Her seizures didn't respond at all to meds and she just kept getting worse, they had said she may just progress until one day she seized to death. But God and her diet are HEALING her!

In a way, we have been open to special needs adoption for several years, and now, at least for myself, even more so. I just asked my husband and he agreed, especially epilepsy, been there, done that, it's bad, but not THAT bad. At least with adoption, you better know how to set your expectations, it's not like bio, where you expect everything to be normal and then have to change all your hopes and dreams to meet reality.

I saw the sweet boy on Reece's that couldn't be hosted because he had epilepsy, and was so sad, especially to see he would now be a late teen.

My husband says one day when we're out of debt (not a huge amount right now, but we have it) and can save towards it. I do think though that the thought is a little stressful for him, and that he wants to use that time for us to grow as parents as well.

Annie said...

Would love to adopt again.

Craig is now too old....for Russia and Ukraine anyway.
Money is an enormous difficulty.
Craig needs a new job....

Doesn't stop my heart from longing.

Karrie said...

Reason we haven't adopted yet... COST. Ack. Working on fixing that.

Sooooo excited for you guys, by the way!!!
Congrats!!!

Karrie in IN

Stephanie said...

We have adopted 7 from EE. Adopting 3 more this year from Bulgaria. COST is our biggest obstacle right now. We are trusting God will provide. We have to raise $19K more. I've spoken w/ many families over the years and cost is always the biggest barrier. We somehow make it work. Once you go over & see the orphanages and all the children, you just have to do something. For us, we are adopting. For others it is advocating. For some it is awareness. Good luck on your adoption journey.

stephanie--www.10kidsin2010.blogspot.com

kdliberty said...

money plain and simple. I would love to adopt 2-3 children especially from Russia. I am also drawn to HIV+ children and they require good health insurance to adopt...

Kristen said...

We adopted our three because of infertility. It's been a wonderful experience. To be honest, we have not considered too closely international adoption because of cost, but also we're just a little leery of the honesty of the orphanages (I think you know the situation I refer to, CHristine), although I know a lot of people have had very successful adoptions internationally.

Anonymous said...

What keeps me from adopting? My husband. He says I need to be done having babies first (am pregnant now with #10, my oldest is 11, we don't believe in using birth control) But, I'm still hoping that one of these days, or years, he will fall in love with a picture, and agree to go ahead with an adoption. (I'm 32, so I could be having babies for a long time yet) I've wanted to adopt kids with special needs for the last 2 decades already.

Qadoshyah said...

I can't adopt myself since I'm just 21. I'd love to and would be totally ready, but since the requirement says I'm too young, I can't.

My family (11 kids) would love to adopt, but my dad doesn't make enough to meet the USCIS requirements for our family size, so we probably wouldn't qualify. I don't know if other things can be counted into that - we have no debt, own our house on 44 acres.

I've looked into ways to see if we could do it, but haven't found anything yet. There is one area I need to look into, so we'll see. . .

Anonymous said...

For me it is my spouse. His heart is not in for adoption. I wish his was, but I know things don't work right if both partners are not on the same page. I keep praying for God to open his heart to adoption. We will see. I keep inserting it into the conversation and am immediately shot down, but I will keep trying... Until his heart is changed, I will live vicariously through you all...
~Catherine :)

pearly1979 said...

We have 3 from KZ, home at 3, 6, and 8. We won't be adopting again any time soon as it's enough for me right now handle all that there is with them and 2 young bio children. I think I would like to foster teens some day when my kids are grown and we have more room again.

Expat Mom said...

I have two bio boys and would LOVE to adopt 2 more little boys because I really feel that our family is not complete unless we have four. However, I'm also not willing to go through pregnancy again (Six pregnancies and only two babies, one of whom was born with a birth defect).

At this point, my husband is not very keen on adoption. Our house is very small, only three rooms, with the bathroom outside. Also, I don't feel that I'm doing the best job with my boys and it makes me wonder if adopting is a good idea. Cost is not an option since we live in Guatemala and would adopt here.

My friend and I are visiting an orphanage this month and our husbands are very worried that we will come back having fallen in love with a child or two! :)

Kerstin said...

I am single.
Was dreaming/planning of adoption from Ukraine for a long time, but was married/pregnant in 2008 when they (Ukraine) changed law which now does not allow single adoption anymore.
Our Baby died, my husband left after that and now single adoption is almost impossible (although I have a great big home, enough money, a lot of experience with children of all ages, a job that leaves enough time/flexibility/money for raising several kids...)
I would love to get tipps from any of you reading this who has experience/success with single adoption from Ukraine after 2008!!

Becky said...

We went broke with the two adoptions we did and by the time we can regenerate enough savings we'll be too old for most situations and for me to want to go through it again. I feel called to do so, but don't see how it can possibly happen.